How repeating a grade changed my life

When I was a kid, academics didn’t come easy for me. It wasn’t because I wasn’t smart but because I lacked maturity at my age when I started school. My birthday is June 29, which meant I was placed in school at the earliest eligible age. While that might not be an issue for some, it was for me. At just six years old in first grade, I found myself struggling to keep up with my classmates, many of whom were months older than me.

At that stage of development, even a few months can make a big difference in a child’s ability to grasp new concepts. By the time I reached second grade, my struggles became even more noticeable. My older peers seemed to breeze through the material, and I just couldn’t catch up. It was frustrating, discouraging, and made school feel like a place I didn’t want to be. I developed a tremendous amount of anxiety.

Then, at the end of my second-grade year, my parents made a tough but life-changing decision for me: they held me back. At the time, I didn’t fully understand why. All I knew was that while my friends were moving on to third grade, I would be repeating second grade. But looking back, I see how that decision completely changed my life for the better.

Once I repeated second grade, everything changed. I was no longer trying to keep up; I was right where I needed to be. My confidence grew. My understanding deepened. My overall experience in school improved drastically. I was able to excel in a way that I hadn’t before, I finally felt like I belonged.

As I’ve grown, I’ve thought a lot about the role age plays in early education. I particularly believe that the ideal age to begin first grade is seven years old. At that age, most children are more developmentally prepared to handle the academic and social demands of school.

They have stronger cognitive skills, better emotional regulation. They simply are more ready to succeed. Rushing a child into school too early can create unnecessary struggles that might follow them for years.

As an adult, I see even more clearly how God used that moment in my life to shape me. In February, I had the opportunity to speak to about 200 kids at Pettit Park School, and I shared my story with them. I wanted them to know that struggling in school doesn’t mean they aren’t capable. It just might mean they need more time, like I did.

For parents, making the decision to hold a child back can be difficult. But sometimes, the best way to love your child is to give them the time they need to grow. Many children across our country struggle with reading and other academic skills, and addressing those struggles early can completely change the trajectory of their lives.

Looking back, I am so grateful that my parents had the wisdom and courage to do what was best for me. That extra year wasn’t a setback; it was a setup for success.